A Mom Entrepreneur's thoughts on: #1 of 53 things to keep in mind if you want to become a better entrepreneur

For several blogs going forward, I'm going to share with you my thoughts on a great blog post: "53 things to keep in mind if you want to become a better entrepreneur." by Neil Patel. His blog Quick Sprout is a must read. The original list is here: http://www.quicksprout.com/2009/08/07/51-ways-to-become-a-better-entrepreneur/


Today: Rule #1 - It's a doozy so I made this entry all about number one.

1. Don't let your emotions cloud your decisions.


This is one of the funniest things I've seen! Women and moms especially are notorious when it comes to emotions. HELLO??? Can anyone say hormones!!! I think women are at a disadvantage when it comes to keeping our emotions in check, its part of our nature. I wouldn't want to do without them, though, because it's what makes me a woman and a mom. We need to be savvy so we can use them to our advantage.

First guilt is so prominent with mom entrepreneurs! We feel guilty when we are busy working because we should be with our kids. We feel guilty when we are with our kids because we should be working! It's a no win situation...or is it? Perhaps we are better at setting boundaries when it comes to working too much.

Anger is another prominent emotion. Depression is very common and for women we display our depression with the inability to control anger. If you can't control your anger, get help.

I think what Neil meant when he wrote that rule was that we need to think with our heads and don't make rash decisions. What you want and what you need are two different things sometimes. As mom entrepreneurs, we really need to be cognizant of "the state of rationalization." I know that sometimes I don't make the right decision because I "just want something." Later, I might regret it but, I won't beat myself up over it. Learn and move on.

Don't just do things because you think it'd be the nice thing to do or it's cool or it seems fun - make sure it makes sense for your business, your family, your friends or yourself! Do the research and weigh the costs. Don't be afraid to ask questions and don't be too proud.

PS - Regina Bonolo is my coach.  I mentioned her on my Time Out video this week.  Here is her website: http://aspirehigher.biz/

Self-Esteem and Business

A very interesting thing happened to me this week and I want to use it as learning event!


As, you all know, I do the Mom’s Time Out video. As a marketing tool, I send the video to my twitter and Facebook accounts. On Monday, a friend of mine posted a comment on my Facebook after my video post that said, “A vision statement – how visionary.”

This sent me reeling! I was so embarrassed. If my friend thinks my video is silly, are there others that don’t speak up??!! I was beside myself. I was just crushed. His opinions mean a lot to me, I truly respect the success he has made for himself.

My first instinct was to send a sarcastic comment back but I thought that didn’t seem professional. I’ve always taught people that if an email makes you upset don’t do anything until you’ve had time to cool off. So, I cooled off and decided to look at it from his point of view.

My friend and I have a teasing kind of relationship. We are always ribbing each other about this and that. I realized that he was just doing and saying things he always says. The difference this time was that instead of making fun of my personal life, (which is ok!), he picked something I did professionally. He probably really didn’t think my video was silly, he just wanted to say hi and that he watched it.

Then, I got very bothered by the fact that I was bothered by it. I decided to send him an email because I did want to address it. I asked that he refrain from teasing me on professional posts because others might not understand our friendship or the comment. I also admitted that my self-esteem isn’t always the best when it comes to my professional life.

I feel confident in my personal life so, I’m comfortable with being teased with my kids or how I look. However, career and business are different for me. Naturally, he told me it wasn’t meant that way and he would remove the comment. He also, gave me a compliment, which felt good even though I forced it on him by obliquely asking: “Do you think my posts are silly?”

I felt good that I addressed the situation. It shows growth on my part. In the past, I would have jabbed back, or made some self-deprecating statement and suffered quietly. Instead, I decided to own what I feel and address it with my friend. My self-esteem took a boost and I ended up with a very productive day!

Next time someone says something that makes you question yourself, have the courage to talk to them about it. Don’t wallow in self-pity. You might have misunderstood or they may just not know how to give good criticism, or as in my case, they meant to harm at all. Make sure you are open, honest and friendly about it and not accusatory so, that you can have productive conversation that lifts you up!

Happy Labor Day, BusiMoms

A poorly written blog with a few random thoughts on labor; forgive me! I just couldn't help myself!

Labor Day has a whole new meaning to me now that I'm a mom! Two labors, two daughters.

The other births, that I've labored over - my two companies. www.thelegalappeal.com & www.epmassociation.org

My companies and my children are "labors" of love.

Some days I just don't want to be a mom and some days I don't want to be a business owner but, I labor on...

My children and my businesses are the fruits of my labor.

I could go on but, I won't. How do you think of Labor Day???? Share your thoughts.

Cheers,
Lorin