A non-profit community of moms who are busy taking care of themselves, their families, their businesses & each other. ~ "BusiMoms!"tm

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

5 Things That Keeps you Stuck in Neutral

Following is a list of 5 things that can keep you stuck in neutral and keep you from reaching your goals or getting projects done!  There are also a few ideas to help you overcome these obstacles!

1. Belief systems – Whatever you believe to be true it true. This is a mantra of mine. If I think something is hard or impossible then it will be. If I am having a hard time getting something done I review my beliefs around the project. Usually, I am the only stopping me from getting most things done. It feels better to blame others than to take a look at myself – I really don’t want to be wrong! LOL However, I find that if I change my belief around an idea then things do become easier and I manage to get more done or overcome obstacles that put in place by only me.

2. Competing priorities – Kids, spouse, house, job, business, friends…the list can go on and on. They all want you. They all want your time! They all have opinions about what you should be doing and how you should be doing them. This contributes to competing priorities. I truly feel the way to overcome this completion is to enlist the help of a third party that doesn’t have an agenda for you besides your success.

3. Competing values – Many people say that they want to have more money, yet they will go out and purchase a brand new car that decreases in value by at least 30% the minute it’s driven off the dealership lot. Competing values are prevalent in financial situations and in family matters. Many will complain about others traits and behaviors that they also possess. For example, think about the last time you were in line at the grocery and had an issue. You want those behind you to be patient and understanding but think about that last time it was someone else who was ahead of you. Where you patient and understanding.

How does this keep you stuck in neutral? Well, financially, if you are trying to get ahead and you keep spending money unwisely, think about the values you have around your purchase. Think about what it most important to you – instant gratification or saving? Neither is wrong, it’s important to visit what you REALLY value and see if you are making choices that go against them.

4. Toxic people – There are people in this world that do not want you to succeed. It benefits them for you to fail. There are people in this world, that no matter what, who are negative and want everyone around them to validate their negativity. Toxic people can be VERY contagious. Look out for them – they will keep you stuck. You do not have to eliminate them from your life. Just be aware of their attitudes and beliefs. Let them say what they have to but don’t buy in!

5. Desire / Passion – Do you really want it bad enough? Perhaps you don’t really have the drive to reach that goal. Most things worth getting take some hard work. If you are passionate enough about it, then nothing will stop in you. The four listed above will not cause you to fail because you will proceed despite obstacle and challenges. People who succeed keep working and trying and don’t give up. Shifting, making mistakes and reinvention might be needed but stopping isn’t an option. The easy way out isn’t an option. If you are stuck, visit your desires and see if they are stong enough.

Friday, May 14, 2010

Pick Your Battles

I had a great conversation this weekend with a friend who is just happens to be a stay-at-home dad. The fact that I had a conversation with a dad instead of a mom has nothing to do with what we talked about – I just like saying that I had a conversation with a dad instead of a mom!

Anyway, I digress.

Our conversation surrounded discipline and the tools we used to motivate our children to do the things we need them to do such as: brush teeth, pick up toys, do homework and so on. We both have young children so many of our motivation tactics involve time outs, soap and perhaps a favorite toy taken away as consequences and money, toys, stickers or food treats as motivation.

During our discussion we came upon the idea of “pick your battles” and the topic really stuck in my head. What was it about pick your battles that resonates with me - a mom who is a business woman?Right after this, a business woman I know, Kim DeYoung of http://www.metromom.com/, told a story during an ecourse she was delivering. She shared a time that someone owed them payment for a product and she didn’t send it to collections. She didn’t want the negative energy – she thought it was better to just let it go. When she said this, it helped me with the connection! She chose to let this “battle” go.

In life we have to pick our battles! Whether we are dealing with our children, our life partners or our customers – we must make conscious choices about the battles we are going to pick to fight. Some are worth fighting and some are not. If we choose to make everything a battle then life will always be a struggle. Do you always want a struggle with your kids or your spouse/partner? I certainly don’t. Next time something rears up - make a conscious decision as to whether you need or want the negative to prevail. If everything is not a battle then everything won’t be…

Monday, May 3, 2010

BusiMom Monday MOMentum 5-3-10.mpg